Altruism and Cynicism
173 aphorisms · 15 comments
Aphorisms in This Category
101–120 (174)
tiny.ag/ne1vhxlr · submitted 1997
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it.
tiny.ag/7do2rifh · submitted 1997
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
Mark Twain, What is Man?, 1906, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/r6bo5aic · submitted 1998 by Mark van Essen
Black, white, brown, yellow or even red, we piss with our pants down, and go naked to bed.
tiny.ag/otpgz4zj · submitted 1997
A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.
tiny.ag/5otyux70 · submitted 1997
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
tiny.ag/58hbs9pq · submitted 1997
It's not true that nice guys finish last. Nice guys are winners before the game even starts.
tiny.ag/amzxlbug · submitted 1997
All humans are hypocrites; the biggest hypocrite of all is the one who claims to detest hypocrisy.
tiny.ag/k8lcsqdw · submitted 1997
Heck, what's a little extortion among friends?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/dliywafc · submitted 1997
I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?
Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/7hdzmwue · submitted 1997
It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
George Bernard Shaw, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/itutlzy5 · submitted 1997
The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.
tiny.ag/9m1hmtxp · submitted 1997
When a man wants to murder a tiger, it's called sport; when the tiger wants to murder him, it's called ferocity.
tiny.ag/lkgjcwse · submitted 1997
Baloney is flattery so thick that it can not be true and blarney is flattery so thin that we like it.
tiny.ag/asecpbyl · submitted 1997
A cynic is a person searching for an honest man, with a stolen lantern.
tiny.ag/0ihiksxu · submitted 1997
On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.
H. Allen Smith, Let the Crabgrass Grow, in Altruism and Cynicism
tiny.ag/euochyxn · submitted 1997
The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made.
Daniel Schorr, in Altruism and Cynicism and Success and Failure
tiny.ag/q93dw7gi · submitted 1997
Until he extends his circle of compassion to include all living things, man will not himself find peace.
tiny.ag/vgoawlvx · submitted 1997
How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a weary world.
tiny.ag/lvmeyokh · submitted 1997
Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance.
tiny.ag/ixldmygb · submitted 1997
A reasonable man adapts himself to suit his environment. An unreasonable man persists in attempting to adapt his environment to suit himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
George Bernard Shaw, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue
101–120 (174)