Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/hfx4m7bz  ·  submitted 1998 by David Shorr

The Satyricon (paperback)

Wisdom and beauty form a very rare combination

Petronius Arbiter, The Satyricon, XCIV, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/tuvabnig  ·  submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/frswba1z  ·  submitted 1997

He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.

Lao Tsu, in Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/hrd6aj12  ·  submitted 1997

A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.

George Patton, in War and Peace and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/o7yghtxb  ·  submitted 1999

1984 (paperback)

Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two equals four. If that is granted, all else follows.

George Orwell, 1984, in Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/e87wmjqg  ·  submitted 1997

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/l5snrywf  ·  submitted 1997

Conscience is the window of our spirit, evil is the curtain.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/5gcdbjbx  ·  submitted 1997

Genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/m6lj8yot  ·  submitted 1997

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -- it only guarantees equality of opportunity.

Irving Kristol, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/bmdpgrs0  ·  submitted 1997

Let's have some new clichés.

Samuel Goldwyn, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/5rylx71v  ·  submitted 1997

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

David Dunham, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/rxe07t5e  ·  submitted 1997

Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.

Benny Hill, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/mtktl96r  ·  submitted 1997

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.

Collis P. Huntington, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x  ·  submitted 1997

Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/poggndv0  ·  submitted 1997

Be polite to all, but intimate with few.

Thomas Jefferson, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/dnj7czjw  ·  submitted 1998

Mankind must give up war in the Atomic Era. What is at stake is the life or death of humanity.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/iv0n7jxr  ·  submitted 1997

If we take science as our sole guide, if we accept and hold fast that alone which is verifiable, the old theology must go.

John Burroughs, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/mnrh4p2b  ·  submitted 1997

Always forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

John F. Kennedy, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/toiqhdlg  ·  submitted 1997

Anybody who wants the presidency so much that he'll spend two years organizing and campaigning for it is not to be trusted with the office.

David Broder, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/dxbh08ml  ·  submitted 1997

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.

Robert F. Kennedy, in Success and Failure