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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/oxoy2gsu · submitted 1997

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Winston Churchill, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/rnxbf2ho · submitted 1998

I hope life isn't a joke, because I don't get it.

Jack Handey, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/a0oxkbo4 · submitted 1997

I think, therefore I am.

René Descartes, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/bpcdcqq7 · submitted 1997

Hitch your wagon to a star.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ev3fc9xo · submitted 1997

Life is like a sewer -- what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

Tom Lehrer, (from the album An Evening Wasted), in Life and Death

tiny.ag/qh2wpltu · submitted 1997

All mankind loves a lover.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/mgtvsjqa · submitted 1997

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.

Thomas Alva Edison, in Success and Failure and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/kiehwrll · submitted 1997

We would often be sorry if our wishes were gratified.

Aesop, in Happiness and Misery and Success and Failure

tiny.ag/7alftveq · submitted 1997

I don't know with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/x06lwkz4 · submitted 1997

Life's tragedy is that we get old to soon and wise too late.

Benjamin Franklin, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/orx9er1h · submitted 1997

The wind and waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators.

Edward Gibbon, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/tuvabnig · submitted 1999

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/wh6qtopk · submitted 1997

I improve on misquotation.

Cary Grant, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/p6bwfqfr · submitted 1997

Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

P. J. O'Rourke, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/8d5pktgj · submitted 1997

A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Dyer, Dyer's Law, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ynhvcg3k · submitted 1997

Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left.