Unknown
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
81–100 (422)
tiny.ag/xnqzybth · submitted 1997
Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
tiny.ag/vykjqus7 · submitted 1997
Join the Army: travel to exotic distant lands, meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.
Unknown, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/0raepug8 · submitted 1997
Jones' Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
tiny.ag/6vqkumld · submitted 1997
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.
tiny.ag/b5lrmegw · submitted 1997
Katz' Law: Man and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Unknown, in War and Peace
tiny.ag/rjjl9rkn · submitted 1997
Kinky is using a feather, perverted is using the whole chicken.
tiny.ag/jaktd8ze · submitted 1997
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
tiny.ag/acorhvan · submitted 1997
Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.
tiny.ag/donivp2q · submitted 1997
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
tiny.ag/ffrhkz8y · submitted 1997
The Golden Rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.
tiny.ag/ezridljt · submitted 1997
The IQ of the group is the lowest IQ of a member of the group divided by the number of people in the group.
tiny.ag/y2wjstfn · submitted 1997
The amount of work to be done increases in proportion to the amount of work already completed.
tiny.ag/tsgrsoaf · submitted 1997
The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.
tiny.ag/nbrpkw6o · submitted 1997
The surest sign that a man is in love is when he divorces his wife.
Unknown, in Love and Hate
tiny.ag/kvmrkdxc · submitted 1997
The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
tiny.ag/vm8pwhyr · submitted 1998 by nthomas
The strong take from the weak, but the smart take from the strong.
tiny.ag/zpdgt5p3 · submitted 1997
The secret to life is that there is no secret.
tiny.ag/zcorimat · submitted 1997
The scriptures teach us the best way of living, the noblest ways of suffering, and the most comfortable ways of dying.
tiny.ag/jmnes1bp · submitted 1997
The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy.
tiny.ag/rlmumka4 · submitted 1998 by Dave Supulski
The most undependable part on your car is the nut holding the wheel.
81–100 (422)