Aphorisms Galore!

Unknown

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/fwsgb93v  ·  submitted 1997

If it weren't for caffeine I'd have no personality whatsoever.

Unknown, in Food and Drink

tiny.ag/piw4y7md  ·  submitted 1997

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/rh0iiyqp  ·  submitted 1997

If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/gjpds4m8  ·  submitted 1997

If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/0xhdtnul  ·  submitted 1997

If people talk negatively about you, live so that no one will believe them.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/ipnqtb0n  ·  submitted 1997

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.

Unknown, in Men and Women

tiny.ag/puraglae  ·  submitted 1997

If the odds are a million to one against something occurring, chances are 50-50 it will.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ina54mbv  ·  submitted 1997

If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/ohvcxj98  ·  submitted 1997

Imbesi's Law with Freeman's Extension: In order for something to become clean, something else must become dirty; but you can get everything dirty without getting anything clean.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/90upthng  ·  submitted 1999

If you're here, you're alive.

Unknown, in Life and Death and Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/f8mrmb30  ·  submitted 1997

If you wish you be like someone else, you waste the person you are.

Unknown, in Happiness and Misery

tiny.ag/ajwgbtvf  ·  submitted 1997

If you were arrested for kindness, would there be enough evidence to convict you?

Unknown, in Altruism and Cynicism and Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bafxiwkf  ·  submitted 1997

If you treat a person as he is, he will remain as he is. If you treat him for what he could be, he will become what he could be.

Unknown, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/t2ay3kb5  ·  submitted 1997

If you see a turtle on a fence post, he has had some help.

Unknown, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ckgbheun  ·  submitted 1997

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you -- but if you really make them think they'll hate you.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/koyyq54r  ·  submitted 1997

If you love your job, you will never have to work another day in your life.

Unknown, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/lue0mtfy  ·  submitted 1997

If we deny love that is given to us, if we refuse to give love because we fear pain or loss, then our lives will be empty, our loss greater.

Unknown, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/o7ofzkdq  ·  submitted 1997

If you can read this, thank a teacher.

Unknown, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/mwma270i  ·  submitted 1997

If you believe everything you read, you'd better not read.

Unknown, (Japanese proverb), in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/hsipkpnw  ·  submitted 1997

If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.

Unknown, in Success and Failure and Wisdom and Ignorance