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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.
Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:
tiny.ag/zwylfryx · submitted 1997
tiny.ag/z91tc0go · submitted 1997
It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
tiny.ag/up1actjs · submitted 1997
Decay is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.
Unknown, (sometimes, almost certainly incorrectly, attributed to the Buddha), in Life and Death
tiny.ag/vfmz7cvr · submitted 1997
If you want a high performance woman, I can go from zero to bitch in less than 2.1 seconds.
tiny.ag/r3davdhl · submitted 1997
In war, there is no substitute for victory.
tiny.ag/hifvkpkc · submitted 1997
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.
tiny.ag/mqbuthzj · submitted 1997 by Brad Johnson
I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead.
tiny.ag/iqolobqc · submitted 1997
In order to preserve your self-respect, it is sometimes necessary to lie and cheat.
tiny.ag/x2tnoops · submitted 1997
The Puritans hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators.
Thomas Macaulay, History of England, I, in Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/poggndv0 · submitted 1997
Be polite to all, but intimate with few.
tiny.ag/hrd6aj12 · submitted 1997
A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.
tiny.ag/hjlqxeds · submitted 1997
In politics, merit is rewarded by the possessor being raised, like a target, to a position to be fired at.
Christian Nevell Bovee, (from Politicians and Other Scoundrels by Ferdinand Lundberg), in Law and Politics
tiny.ag/1zzynlyn · submitted 1997
These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves.
tiny.ag/xkpfj82n · submitted 1997
Religion has done love a great service by making it a sin.
tiny.ag/soebrnq6 · submitted 1997
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance.
Sam Brown, (Washington Post, 1977), in Wisdom and Ignorance
tiny.ag/kygnp58l · submitted 1997
To be prepared against surprise is to be trained. To be prepared for surprise is to be educated.
tiny.ag/ojpztwu9 · submitted 1997
Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.
tiny.ag/tuvabnig · submitted 1999
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Woody Allen, in Life and Death and Love and Hate
tiny.ag/ry72cat0 · submitted 1997
There is no security on this earth; there is only opportunity.
tiny.ag/2cctxyhg · submitted 1997
If we fight a war and win it with H-bombs, what history will remember is not the ideals we were fighting for but the methods we used to accomplish them. These methods will be compared to the warfare of Genghis Khan who ruthlessly killed every last inhabitant of Persia.